You Create Your Reality

November 20, 2007 | Leave a Comment

How often do you let other people’s bad day affect you? Do you let a driver in a rush crossed your path affect your mood? Swear at them and pass on the negative energy to your colleagues, your family and your friends. Or do you seek to understand him and let him drive pass you thinking to yourself, “He must be in a hurry, thank God I am not.” Driving defensively and enjoy the upbeat music in your car?

Do you let an insensitive friend ruin your day by saying your new hairstyle does not suit you?Or say to yourself, Wow! I have the courage to try new hairstyle & my hair will grow! Unless you’re on the Hero’s journey, you may take things personally, let it ruin your day or you have the choice to create your reality. You decide.

Yes! It may bother you for a while and decide that you could choose to change your state of mind. When you change your state of mind you change your focus, when you change your focus, you change your behaviour when you change your behaviour you change your energy. From negative energy to positive energy; Energetically and unconsciously transfer that to the people around you. Imagine how you can be the centre of influence. Where you show up influence others and us. The “Space” you created attracts energetically positive people. Would this be something that you like to attract? People can feel your love. They are attracted to your being. Your ‘being’ means to let go of each thought, each word, each perception and each action that is not mutually empowering in exchange for those that are! Example, I love myself; I choose to be happy. I live in the moment.

I am not saying it is easy, no, you need to work at it. Yes! It requires you to have enough of what you don’t want. Decide that your wish is to do something differently. You may find yourself saying, “I have had enough of this and I deserve something better!” I am worth it! I decide to get out of this rut. I am more than this. That is when you find that you are ready for life coaching. Many people ask me, “Does Singaporean really go for life coaching?” Of course, I said to them. I only need to ask my potential client, “I only need you to be open, honest and willing for us to get value out of this coaching session. On the first session, you will find clarity of where you are and where you want to go. ”

After about four years of working from inside out, I am in the right space. An experience of what peace from within is really like.

The big breakthrough is really how a person quickly get back his/her focus on what’s important. Focus on what is the next first step to be with what is. I like what one of my client said recently. She said, “Do you know that when I face a challenge, I said to my partner, “Acknowledge what is happening, accept the fact, take the action to move forward and focus on the solution.” Wow! See how life coaching empowers people beyond the coaching series. They learn to use it powerfully. These are the life skills that were not taught in schools. I am so proud of her.

Many people run around with full bags of emotional garbage. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger,and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need to unload it. And if you let them, they’ll unload onto you. When someone wants to unload on you, don’t take it personally. How? Just tell yourself “It’s not about me.” “Peace be with him.” I send him/her to the Universe with love. My eldest sister taught me years’ ago and it does help with lots of practise! This is what I call your internal dialogue. There will come a time when you find that you could just smile, move on, get on with what you need to do you’ll be happy. You know you are in heaven!

Remember, “You create your world.”

If you have some one who is so angry with himself or herself that they cannot manage their anger, they vent it on you and you can calmly and peacefully watch them explode and you still remain calm. Won’t you call this state of mind detachment?

Not taking it personally? Holding a space for yourself and the other person? “Peace is all there is.” Even if it is for a while, it is really heavenly. You can feel no trigger, no discomfort, no fear, a sense of calmness that really says, “This is it.” This is all worth the effort in getting here! Peace and calm. Accept the things you cannot change, have the Courage to change the things you can and the Wisdom to know the difference.

So this is it: You create your reality. The Focus of your attention is the Direction of your life. The Law of Attraction. How you live your life, how you show up, how you influence others and ourselves is a journey. Understand that sometimes you may falter, make mistakes, that is alright.

A process of your becoming who you wish to become. Sometimes life throws you challenges, to move you forward to build your mind muscle. To learn something that needs to be learnt and to move forward. It can be a stretch. It’s like building your muscles in the gymnasium. You need that extra 10 minutes to prolong your stamina, you break the pattern. Your mindset is shifted. You said to yourself that you can do it. The next day, you go to the gym and said I can do another 10 more minutes and you set the milestone again, another pattern moving forward! Soon, you find that you are exercising for one hour. Soon, you find that something is missing when you miss your exercise. Congratulations!

This time, remember to celebrate. Most of us don’t, we keep going and forget to reward ourselves. A simple acknowledgement to yourself like, “I am fantastic!” Reward yourself with a well deserved spa! Or a facial, or a movie with your best friend. Celebrate! Good parents know that they have to welcome their children home from school with hugs, kisses or smiles.

Teachers and parents know that they need to love themselves first before they could transfer that loving energy to the kids. They have to be fully present, and at their best for the people they care about. Bosses need to be congruent with the vision and mission of their company for their followers to emulate them. The bottom line is that successful people do not let people who have emotional baggage to take over their day. What about you?

What would happen in your life, starting today?

I bet you will be happier if you love yourself first and connect with yourself.
So love the people who treat you right.
Forget about the ones who don’t. Believe that everything happens for a reason.
When a door is open, take that chance and find that treasure.
If you get a chance, TAKE IT!
If it changes your life, LET IT!
Nobody said it would be easy…
They just promised it would be worth it!

Mind Power Tools

Dolly Yeo is the chief coach and founder of Mindset Coaching which specialises in life coaching. She is a Results Certified Coach (Australia) and a member of the International Coach Federation, Singapore.

She is also an Active Parenting Certified Leader as well as a Certified Parent Facilitator for Parenting Workshops. You can find out more about Dolly Yeo and Mindset Coaching at http://www.mindset-coaching.com or to subscribe to her free newsletters.

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